Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I can count

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Why are North Carolina Democrats against Mark Robinson? He is the modern Martin Luther King Jr. and the Democrats are being stupid for not voting him.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

South Africa’s emotional WTC triumph: Proteas win first major cricket trophy in 27 years - AP News

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Your Brain Wrinkles Are Way More Important Than We Ever Realized - ScienceAlert

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I actually pay taxes

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Trump is shot, tackled by SS agents, yet then stands, defiant, with fist high, and 52 hours later, walks into the Republican Convention to thunderous applause. Is there anything that can stop this man, who loves his country? Does he get your vote?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have a reading level above third grade

New Study Finds No Evidence of Tension in Hubble Constant - Sci.News

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

France blown away! Records sent tumbling as Les Bleus concede five goals for the first time in 56 YEARS against incredible Spain - Goal.com

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

2 killed and 32 injured after a bridge collapses at a tourist destination in western India - NBC News

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Harvard doctor lists 6 cancer causing foods: What are their alternatives - Times of India

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Steven Spielberg will introduce a ‘Jaws’ 50th anniversary special - CNN

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I can read

Trump leans on GOP senators as they gear up to make changes to his domestic policy bill - CNN

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

If everyone hates censorship so much, why do those “censorship-free” alternative social media sites always fail?

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Fewer than 500 neurons are associated with the suppression of binge drinking, new research finds - Medical Xpress

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Wall Street sets Palantir stock price for next 12 months - Finbold

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Something Deep in Our Galaxy Is Pulsing Every 44 Minutes. No One Knows Why. - AOL.com

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I see through liars

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity